Hi everyone my story similar to all that’s posted.
Started my addicted when I was 18 never thought these machines would do me so much harm. I’m a pokie player I could still remember the first day of playing putting that $1 coin hitting 7c and not really caring. After uni would go to the local pubs after finishing class and work and meet with friends til a few years after not realising how quick time has gone by that I’ve been suckered into this trance or wanting to win. I’m 29 now and could honestly say I’ve worked damn hard to make money and I’ve got nothing to show for it.
I dropped out of uni as I could no longer concentrate anymore and just worked for years and years not a cent to my name. I had a car I bought on finance in 2011 and instead of paying the bills I would just feed everything through the pokies knowing too well that I can’t win but something in my head just said to keep going day after day. After so many promises to myself and my girlfriend which I would be with her for 8 years this August she’s been right by my side for everything. 6 months later my car would get repossessed I had a credit card I didn’t pay and maxed out. Bank sends debt collectors for the loans and car also which they auctioned off for a cheap price and chased me for the shortfall.
I have borrowed thousands and thousands of dollars against my partners name which til this day we are paying off. I would go on to gamble thousands, I remember one night I didn’t stop feeding the machine til I got a free game session lasted 5-6 hours after $10,000 empty bank account maxed credit card still no free game. Mind you was in the casino and you could hit upwards to $500-600 a hit and realised I had hit rock bottom then this was around 3-4 years ago. My last session was last night 8 hours straight in the casino lost all my money and my partners we are in so much debt today its not funny anymore every time I say this is the last time last time last time I feel like I’m just repeating myself and lying to myself.
I’ve come to the conclusion I can’t win anymore I’m mentally ill right now can’t think anything my work is affected friends I don’t see much because I’m a shame and they know I make good money and can’t hang out I’m always broke. Feel sorry for my partner I couldn’t give give her the life she deserves and she struggles with the decisions I’ve made its affecting her as much as me maybe more. And today as of the 11th of July 2018 want to be pokie free for the rest of my life and pay off all this debt I’ve brought upon myself and partner and move on. I know it’s going to be a struggle and not going to be easy but I feel like the whole system around us is designed to fail people like me we can’t escape this problem everywhere I look is a tab pokie room club rsl and gambling is just all around.
I hope I can be honest with myself from now on and stick to my word and will attend AA meeting and financial counselling asap because if I continue like this I’m going to lose my friends and family and especially my partner and end up on the streets or something worse. Please if anyone that has read this and considered going to play a machine or any other form of gambling stay away your future self will thank you and you won’t have to endure what I’ve endured of sleepless nights stress anxiety depression everything its not worth it.